Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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