There was a lot of him and a little penis
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
