Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize