you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize