this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
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Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
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She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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