Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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