I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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