He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
