Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize