This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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