He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
