TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
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