I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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