someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
