She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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