I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
