dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
