i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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