new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
