I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
There was a lot of him and a little penis
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize