An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
MIDGETS
????
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
