: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
