someone get that fucking seahorse.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
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