I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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