either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
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its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
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You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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