Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
