i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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