I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i love accidental penises.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
