So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
