I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Can you bring me the toilet please
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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