Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
