Cold hands, warm shart.
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
no you cant smoke seaweed
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
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