And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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