And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
