omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
