How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Enjoy the penises
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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