Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
