We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
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