He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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