I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize