Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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