i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
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