I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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