its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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