The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize
