hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
