the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize