One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize