508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
