turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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